Ladies And Gentlemen Of The Jury I Present To You...

[MalahatTwo7]

Exhibit #1, a HAM SANDWICH..........

Florida women disarm gun-toting intruder with ham sandwich and rum

Canadian Press Thursday, October 30, 2003

TAMPA, Fla. (AP) - Confronted with an armed intruder in their home, two women plied him with a ham sandwich and rum until he became groggy and passed out.

Police arrived and arrested Alfred Sweet, 52, to end the five-hour episode.

Cathy Ord, 60, and Rose Bucher, 63, said they tried to befriend the man after he burst through their kitchen window with a sawed-off shotgun Tuesday night.

They made him a sandwich, gave him a bottle of rum and suggested he shower and shave so he could "sort of be disguised in his getaway," Ord said.

"We just treated him with kindness," Bucher said.

She said she had offered Sweet cash and the keys to her Cadillac, but he just sat with them, holding his gun. The intruder never said what he wanted, the women said.

© Copyright 2003 The Canadian Press

Now if this is not a very prime example of "keeping your cool under fire" then I don't know what is.

[MalahatTwo7]

NAKED AS A JAYBIRD?????

Wisconsin Lawyers Face Bare Facts About Nudity

POSTED: 8:51 a.m. EST November 5, 2003

MADISON, Wis. -- A couple of Wisconsin lawyers are in trouble for showing a little more than their habeas corpus.

David Burleson and Todd Buss have pleaded no contest to disorderly conduct after they were busted in the nude.

The attorneys were found naked in the laundry room of a downtown Madison apartment building. It was after Wisconsin's victory over Ohio State last month.

According to police reports, the lawyers were very drunk and singing loudly. They told the officers they were rain-soaked and that a resident told them they could dry off in the laundry room.

The naked lawyers had to pay a $200 fine.
Copyright 2003 by The Associated Press.