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  • Town poses nude in pothole protest
    OTTAWA (Reuters) - People in a small town in Western Canada
    are so fed up with the rotten state of their main road that
    they came up with an unusual form of protest -- a calendar that
    shows them posing nude in the potholes.
    One inhabitant of Leader, Saskatchewan, is shown sitting in
    a canoe that is perched in a pothole. Another has his dignity
    preserved by a well-placed camera while a third man covers up
    with a strategic hubcap.
    "The initial impression when people open the calendar for
    the first time is 'Oh my God!' It's pretty dramatic," said
    Wayne Elhard, the local member of the provincial legislature.
    Leader, a town of just 1,000 in a largely farming area of
    southwest Saskatchewan, says it can't afford to fix all its
    roads.
    "The potholes are not small, one-foot diameter potholes.
    They are many feet across and sometimes they're as deep as a
    foot deep and sometimes they will stretch for yards (meters),"
    Elhard told CBC television on Wednesday.
    Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
    Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

    *Gathering Crust Since 1968*
    On the web at www.section2wildfire.com

    Comment


    • Battle rages on over fireman who ate dog food
      LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - A black firefighter who stood to
      collect nearly $3 million over a prank involving dog food in
      his spaghetti is at the center of a political and racial furor
      in Los Angeles, where city leaders failed on Wednesday to put
      the case to rest.
      After two days of grappling with Mayor Antonio
      Villaraigosa's veto of a $2.7 million settlement in a racial
      discrimination lawsuit filed by 19-year fire department veteran
      Tennie Pierce, the City Council voted to send the case back to
      the drawing board.
      "Before we render a decision to settle in the amount of
      $2.7 million, lets look at all the evidence," Villaraigosa said
      at a news conference. "Lets ensure that all the facts are on
      the table."
      At issue is whether Pierce was the victim of a harmless
      firehouse joke or vicious racism when his comrades slipped dog
      food into his spaghetti two years ago.
      The 2005 lawsuit attracted little notice in Los Angeles
      until earlier this month, when the council took the advice of
      City Attorney Rocky Delgadillo and voted to pay Pierce the $2.7
      million without going to trial.
      Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
      Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

      *Gathering Crust Since 1968*
      On the web at www.section2wildfire.com

      Comment


      • Received this little ditty on the weather in BC this morning. If you have ever lived in lower mainland of BC, you can appreciate this.


        WHAT'S WITH THIS WEATHER?

        17 Degrees Celsius in Halifax? Torontonians sitting outdoors at sidewalk cafes sipping mocha frappucinos earlier this week? Where do they think they are, Vancouver?!? But wait, what's happening in Lotus-Land north? Yes it's true, Vancouver has had actual snow! And it's been on the ground for a whole week now - that's a record! Centimetres of the white stuff fell, and it was a shock to everyone, putting a serious dent in our winter flower bloom count. The winter bird population in Vancouver is confused, wondering if they flew north instead of south last month! I thought it important to share some informative news reports that I have been compiling recently on this regional crisis, so that all Canadians can understand the plight facing your hardy west-coast country men/women:

        Chilled Vancouver commuters faced their 6th day of winter hell today, as an additional centimetre of the peculiar white stuff fell, bringing the lower mainland to its knees and causing millions of dollars worth of damage to the marijuana crops. Scientists suspect that the substance is some form of frozen water particles and experts from Manitoba are being flown in.

        With temperatures dipping to the almost but not quite near zero mark, Vancouverites were warned to double insulate their lattes before venturing out. Vancouver police recommended that people stay inside except for emergencies, such as running out of espresso or biscotti, to see them through Vancouver's most terrible storm to date. The local Canadian Tire reported that they had completely sold out of fur-lined sandals.

        Drivers were cautioned to put their convertible tops up, and several have been shocked to learn that their SUV's actually have four wheel drive, although most have no idea how to use it.

        Below is an outline of the beginning of this frightening time in Vancouver.

        Chronology of the Snow crisis, Vancouver style.

        * 5:35 pm. Environment Canada predicts two to five centimetres of snow will fall on Vancouver within a 24-hour period. Local well-known weather man Phil Reimer reads the forecast on-air, turns white and faints.

        * 5:40 pm. Vancouver Mayor Sam Sullivan issues immediate appeal for federal assistance. Prime Minister Steven Harper promises to send in the army.

        * 6:15 pm. It turns out B.C.'s last army base, CFB Chilliwack, was closed in 1998, by the Liberal Government. Prime Minister Stephen Harper suggests a call to Quebec advertising agencies to purchase snow blowers, 'since that's where the Liberals spent all our money anyway.'

        * 8:45 pm. Vancouverites begin queuing at tire stores, leaving vehicles in line overnight to be first served in morning.

        * 5:22 am. Temperature plunges. Word spreads that a west side resident found ice on the windshield of his BMW convertible. Curious neighbours gathered to watch him scrape it off with a credit card. One motorist, a former Alberta oil man, claims use of mysterious 'defrost' switch on dashboard can aid in process.

        * 8:15 am. Terrified downtown skateboarders lose toques to menacing mob of balding, middle-aged men. 'We tried to run,' they say, 'but our stupid baggy pants made us fall down.'

        * 9:30 am. Hardware stores sell both of the snow shovels. Residents begin cobbling together implements made from kayak paddles, umbrellas, cookie sheets and boogie boards.

        * 10:00 am. Golfers switch to orange balls. Stanley Park cricket players, anxious not to repeat the ugly 'snow-blower incident' of the Blizzard of '96, switch to orange uniforms.

        * 12:00 Noon. Word of impending West Coast snowfall tops newscasts across Canada. Saskatoon hospitals report epidemic of sprained wrists related to viewers “high-fiving” one another.

        * 1:20 pm. Elementary schools call in grief counsellors. Grief counsellors refuse to go, citing lack of snow tires.

        * 2:30 pm. Rush hour begins an hour early as office workers come down with mysterious illnesses and bolt for home. Usual traffic snarl is compounded by large number of four-wheel-drives abandoned by side of road. Hospitals report a large influx of patients arriving in emergency clenching their steering wheels, unable to release their grip.

        * 2:50 pm. Airplanes grounded, highways closed, and ferries docked. No way to travel between Vancouver Island and Lower Mainland, or Lower Mainland and rest of the world. Vancouver Sun headline: South-western BC Separated from Rest of Canada. Quebecers begin chant of “Moi Aussi”.

        * 3:10 pm. At behest of Provincial Emergency Program, authorities begin adding Prozac to drinking water.

        * 3:50 pm. Fears of food shortage lead to alarming scenes of violence and looting. Grocery shoppers riot across the city, except in Shaugnessy in the tony west side of Vancouver, where residents hire caterers to do the rioting for them.

        * 4:30 pm. Bracing for the arrival of snow, the city is gripped by an eerie stillness reminiscent of London on the eve of a WWII invasion. Searchlights comb darkening sky for first sign of precipitation.

        * 5:30 pm. Phil Reimer, shaking uncontrollably, tells viewers that snow warning has been extended. This weather pattern could go on for days. Mercury plummets to Calgary-in-August levels. Martial law is declared. Lower Mainland politicians announce plans to establish emergency command centre in Oahu.

        * 5:50 pm. Prime Minister Harper announces Canada's DART rapid response team can be on the ground within six months.
        'We can't leave Vancouver to deal with 225 centimetres of snow on its own,' he tells Mayor Sullivan.
        'Um, that's two-to-five centimetres, not two-two-five,' replies the mayor.
        The prime minister hangs up.

        H.E. (Heather) Raney
        Major
        Support Services Officer
        Canadian Defence Liaison Staff (Washington)



        PS... I think we've seen a variation of this a few times, but oh well.
        If you don't do it RIGHT today, when will you have time to do it over? (Hall of Fame basketball player/coach John Wooden)

        "I may be slow, but my work is poor." Chief Dave Balding, MVFD

        "Its not Rocket Science. Just use a LITTLE imagination." (Me)

        Get it up. Get it on. Get it done!

        impossible solved cotidie. miracles postulo viginti - quattuor hora animadverto

        IACOJ member: Cheers, Play safe y'all.

        Comment


        • U.S. plane forced to land after passenger lights match to hide flatulence
          05/12/2006 10:01:00 PM


          NASHVILLE, Tenn. (AP) - An American Airlines flight was forced to make an emergency landing in Nashville after a passenger lit a match to disguise the scent of flatulence, authorities said Tuesday.


          The Dallas-bound flight was diverted to Nashville on Monday after several passengers reported smelling burning sulphur from the matches, said Lynne Lowrance, spokeswoman for the Nashville International Airport Authority. All 99 passengers and five crew members were taken off and screened while the plane was searched and luggage was screened.
          The FBI questioned a passenger who admitted she struck the matches in an attempt to conceal a "body odour," Lowrance said. She had an unspecified medical condition, authorities said.

          "It's humorous in a way but you feel sorry for the individual, as well," she said.

          "It's unusual that someone would go to those measures to cover it up."

          The flight took off again but the woman was not allowed back on the plane. The woman, who was not identified, was not charged in the incident.
          September 11th - Never Forget

          I respect firefighters and emergency workers worldwide. Thank you for what you do.

          Sheri
          IACOJ CRUSTY CONVENTION CHAIR
          Honorary Flatlander

          RAY WAS HERE FIRST

          Comment


          • That story has even "made" the news on the radio today too. Many jokes about "pull my finger" and "the Order of the Eternal Blue Flame" have been mentioned......
            If you don't do it RIGHT today, when will you have time to do it over? (Hall of Fame basketball player/coach John Wooden)

            "I may be slow, but my work is poor." Chief Dave Balding, MVFD

            "Its not Rocket Science. Just use a LITTLE imagination." (Me)

            Get it up. Get it on. Get it done!

            impossible solved cotidie. miracles postulo viginti - quattuor hora animadverto

            IACOJ member: Cheers, Play safe y'all.

            Comment


            • Heard that one on the radio on the way home from work yesterday and almost had to pull off the road i was laughing so hard. Next time maybe she should bring along a can of Oust or Fabreze or pack her tail end with those little vanilla scented wafers they throw in your car at the car wash.

              Comment


              • Santa's evil sidekick? Who knew?
                GRESTEN, Austria (Reuters) - As Christmas nears, Austrian
                children hoping for gifts from Santa Claus will also be
                watching warily for "Krampus," his horned and hairy sidekick.
                In folklore, Krampus was a devil-like figure who drove away
                evil spirits during the Christian holiday season.
                Traditionally, he appeared alongside Santa around December
                6, the feast of St. Nicholas, and the two are still part of
                festivities in many parts of central Europe.
                But these traditions came under the spotlight in Austria
                this year, after reports last week that Santa -- also known as
                St Nicholas, Father Christmas or Kris Kringle -- had been
                banned from visiting kindergartens in Vienna because he scared
                some children.
                Officials denied the reports, but said from now on only
                adults the children knew would be able to don Santa's bushy
                white beard and red habit to visit the schools.
                Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
                Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

                *Gathering Crust Since 1968*
                On the web at www.section2wildfire.com

                Comment


                • Judging reality?

                  Critics applauded for trashing movie
                  RIO DE JANEIRO, Brazil (Reuters) - Brazil's state tourism
                  body applauded U.S. film critics Tuesday for trashing a horror
                  movie in which tourists get slaughtered in the country and said
                  it was taking measures to offset any damage to its image
                  abroad.
                  Some Brazilian media went into a frenzy over "Turistas,"
                  quoting disgusted Brazilian viewers who went to see it in the
                  United States where it hit the screens Friday.
                  In the movie directed by John Stockwell, young American
                  backpackers are attacked and mugged by locals, lured by
                  bikini-clad beauties only to get drugged by spiked "caipirinha"
                  cocktails. They then have their internal organs removed by a
                  crazy surgeon who runs a human organ trafficking ring.
                  Jeanine Pires, president of the tourism body Embratur, told
                  Reuters it had instructed its overseas publicity agency to
                  repair any damage from "Turistas."
                  "Surveys show that most viewers do distinguish between pure
                  fiction that appears in a horror movie and reality, Pires said.
                  Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
                  Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

                  *Gathering Crust Since 1968*
                  On the web at www.section2wildfire.com

                  Comment


                  • Naked Truth!

                    Lawmaker summoned to explain sex tape
                    JAKARTA (Reuters) - An Indonesian parliamentary committee
                    intends to question a legislator over a video distributed on
                    the Internet that appears to show him naked with a singer, the
                    head of the committee said Wednesday.
                    The shaky, one-minute video that appears to show Yahya
                    Zaini, a member of parliament from the country's biggest party,
                    Golkar, with the woman has caused shock in Indonesia, the
                    world's most populous Muslim country.
                    "We will summon him and ask him explain this matter
                    clearly," Slamet Effendy Yusuf, chairman of the House of
                    Representatives' honorary commission, said by telephone.
                    The commission has the power to dismiss lawmakers.
                    Yusuf said Zaini, also chairman of Golkar's religious
                    affairs department, could be dismissed as legislator if it was
                    proved that he was the person on the video, which media reports
                    said was shot two years ago.
                    Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
                    Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

                    *Gathering Crust Since 1968*
                    On the web at www.section2wildfire.com

                    Comment


                    • Losing your cookies?

                      San Francisco says no to cookie aroma at bus stops
                      SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - What was billed as a pleasing
                      alternative to exhaust fumes at San Francisco bus stops ended
                      after officials Tuesday ordered the removal of advertisements
                      that gave off the scent of baked cookies.

                      The fragrant billboards, posted at five bus shelters on
                      Monday in an effort by dairy producers to make passengers
                      thirsty for milk, had to come down because the shelters'
                      maintenance contractor had not informed San Francisco Municipal
                      Transportation Agency officials, said an agency spokeswoman.

                      "What they did not do is consult with anybody at our agency
                      prior to doing that," spokeswoman Maggie Lynch said. "We found
                      out from a reporter. Apparently everybody knew besides us."

                      The agency also received several complaints from bus riders
                      concerned that the aroma might not be safe, she said.

                      The project was cooked up by the California Milk Processor
                      Board, whose "Got Milk?" campaign has adorned famous figures
                      around the world with milk mustaches for 13 years.
                      Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
                      Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

                      *Gathering Crust Since 1968*
                      On the web at www.section2wildfire.com

                      Comment


                      • Huh?

                        Prison tattoo program scrapped
                        OTTAWA, Dec 4 (Reuters Life!) - Canada is scrapping a pilot
                        program that provided tattoos for prisoners in an effort to
                        stop the spread of diseases such as hepatitis and AIDS, Public
                        Safety Minister Stockwell Day said Monday.

                        The program, set up by the previous Liberal government,
                        offered free tattoos to prisoners in six of Canada's 58 federal
                        prisons. The Liberals lost in January to the right-wing
                        Conservatives, who promised to crack down on crime.

                        "Our government will not spend taxpayers' money on
                        providing tattoos for convicted criminals," Day said in a
                        statement.

                        "Our priority is to have an effective federal corrections
                        system that protects Canadians, while providing inmates with
                        access to acceptable health care and treatment programs."

                        Day said this included programs to immunize inmates against
                        hepatitis A and B, voluntary screening for early detection and
                        treatment of infection, and courses to inform prisoners about
                        the dangers of illegal tattoos.
                        Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
                        Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

                        *Gathering Crust Since 1968*
                        On the web at www.section2wildfire.com

                        Comment


                        • Metrosexuals snap up cosmetics in China
                          BEIJING, Dec 5 (Reuters Life!) - Urban Chinese men spend
                          8.6 minutes a day gazing at themselves in the mirror and shell
                          out 80 yuan ($10) a month on beauty products, Xinhua news
                          agency reported on Tuesday, citing a survey.

                          Men in Beijing and the financial center of Shanghai were
                          neck-and-neck on whose residents were most vain.

                          Those in the capital spent the most money on cosmetics --
                          an average of 119 yuan a month -- but those in Shanghai looked
                          in the mirror the longest -- about 17 minutes a day.

                          The survey of men aged 18 to 60 in seven major Chinese
                          cities was conducted jointly by Horizon Research Consultancy
                          Group and a Shanghai fashion and media company, Xinhua said.

                          Chinese consumers are becoming increasingly image conscious
                          as they grow wealthier, with plastic surgery and sales of
                          beauty products booming.
                          Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
                          Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

                          *Gathering Crust Since 1968*
                          On the web at www.section2wildfire.com

                          Comment


                          • Town to enforce ban on "sexy" dress
                            KUALA LUMPUR, Dec 5 (Reuters Life!) - A town in
                            Muslim-majority Malaysia has threatened to fine non-Muslim
                            women for wearing "sexy" clothes, infuriating some women's
                            organizations.

                            Authorities in northeast Kota Baru, which calls itself an
                            Islamic city, will slap fines of up to 500 ringgit ($140) on
                            women who expose navels, wear body-hugging outfits, mini-skirts
                            or see-through blouses, the Star newspaper said on Tuesday.

                            "Such outfits are prohibited here as it smears the
                            reputation of Kota Baru and affects its status as an Islamic
                            city," the Star quoted municipal council spokesman Azman Daham
                            as saying.

                            Some women's groups have voiced anger over the council's
                            decision to use an existing by-law against indecent dress to
                            curb non-Muslim fashions. In Malaysia, almost half the
                            population is non-Muslim and national government is secular.

                            "It is not the job of the council to become the 'moral
                            police'," Honey Tan, head of the All-Women's Action Society,
                            told the Star.
                            Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
                            Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

                            *Gathering Crust Since 1968*
                            On the web at www.section2wildfire.com

                            Comment


                            • BEIJING, Dec 4 (Reuters Life!) - A Chinese coal mine has
                              made the news for a reason other than the grim series of
                              accidents nationwide -- it is claiming a world record for the
                              the highest number of simultaneous weddings held underground.
                              The Datong Coal Group in Shanxi province held weddings for
                              10 miners on Saturday 300 metres (1,000 ft) down the pitshaft,
                              the People's Daily said on Monday.
                              "The weddings were unprecedented nationwide, even
                              worldwide," mine manager Liu Suisheng told the newspaper.
                              "We're going to apply to Guinness World Records."
                              China has the world's deadliest coal mining industry with
                              fatal accidents occurring almost daily as safety regulations
                              are ignored and production is pushed beyond safe limits in the
                              rush for profit.
                              The weddings aim to "lessen the depressing impression" of
                              the mining industry, Liu told the newspaper.
                              Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
                              Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

                              *Gathering Crust Since 1968*
                              On the web at www.section2wildfire.com

                              Comment


                              • Marketing ideas...???

                                Real men do change diapers -- from a tractor tire
                                NEW YORK (Reuters Life!) - A U.S. handbag manufacturer is
                                trying to make changing diapers a bit more macho -- with a baby
                                bag made from truck and tractor tire inner tubes.
                                Richmond, Virginia based Passchal has designed a "Dad's
                                baby bag" made from recycled inner tubes, trimmed with hemp,
                                and fitted with a battery operated light to help locate that
                                soother somewhere at the bottom of the bag.
                                Designer Angela Greene said the inspiration for the bag
                                came after a female client asked if she could make a baby bag
                                for her husband to use.
                                "As I was designing it, I thought that the buckles,
                                grommets, rivets gave it a Harley look," she told Reuters.
                                Ken Kobrick, owner of Passchal, said the "Dad's baby bag,"
                                priced at about $175, was the latest in a line of bags that his
                                company made from used truck and tractor tire inner tubes.
                                Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
                                Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

                                *Gathering Crust Since 1968*
                                On the web at www.section2wildfire.com

                                Comment

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