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Words of wisdom, deep thought, compassion and english.
A Few Zen Thoughts For Those Who Take Life Too
Seriously:
1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
2. A day without sunshine is like, uhhh...night.
3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
4. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the
spot.
5. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel
universe.
7. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
8. Remember, half the people you know are below
average.
9. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
10.Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
11. The early bird may get the worm, but the second
mouse gets the cheese.
12. I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
13. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some
people have.
14. Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your week.
15. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad
memory.
16. Change is inevitable, except from vending
machines.
17. Get a new car for your spouse. It'll be a great
trade!
18. Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
19. Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!
20. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of
payments.
21. How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my
hand....
22. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
23. How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
24. If everything seems to be going well, you have
obviously overlooked something.
25. When everything is coming your way, you're in the
wrong lane.
26. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays
off now.
27. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just
don't have film.
28. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy
her friends?
29. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into
jet engines.
30. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn
louder.
31. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
32. Inside every older person is a younger person
wondering what the hell happened.
Seriously:
1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
2. A day without sunshine is like, uhhh...night.
3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
4. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the
spot.
5. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6. I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel
universe.
7. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
8. Remember, half the people you know are below
average.
9. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
10.Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
11. The early bird may get the worm, but the second
mouse gets the cheese.
12. I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
13. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some
people have.
14. Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your week.
15. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad
memory.
16. Change is inevitable, except from vending
machines.
17. Get a new car for your spouse. It'll be a great
trade!
18. Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
19. Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!
20. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of
payments.
21. How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my
hand....
22. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
23. How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
24. If everything seems to be going well, you have
obviously overlooked something.
25. When everything is coming your way, you're in the
wrong lane.
26. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays
off now.
27. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just
don't have film.
28. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy
her friends?
29. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into
jet engines.
30. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn
louder.
31. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
32. Inside every older person is a younger person
wondering what the hell happened.
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