Does it still effect y'all too?

[SCOOBY14B Forum Member Find all posts View Profile Close SCOOBY14B]

It has been 3 1/2 months and yet the things that happened in September 11th still haunt me. I am a career firefighter in Georgia, many many miles away from NY. I was working the day of the attacks and only ran med calls, wrecks and "routine" calls. I did not enter a tower and save thousands of lives.
Yet, I still have trouble sleeping at night. I close my eyes and think about the 343 brothers I lost. I sit around the station and look at the faces of the guys I work with and wonder what it would be like to lose any of them.
I am not even trying to compare what I am feeling to those guys in NY, or try to justify why I am feeling it. I myself am having a hard time figuring it out. I cant even imagine what the guys must feel like that lost hundreds of brothers.
I guess I am wanting to know how many others feel this?

I am not having a pitty party...just hoping I am not a "headcase"

[Firebear230 Forum Member Find all posts View Profile Close Firebear230]

I don't think you are alone. Sometimes I see a story on the news or read an article and start getting all teary-eyed again. I don't personally know any of those souls lost that day, but, it doesn't really matter. The loss is staggering and I think we all keep it in the back of our minds.

We need to remeber what happened. We need to keep the memory of those lost alive and take care of the loved ones left behind. It should stay in the back of our minds on every call, reminding us of why we do what we do. As far as I'm concerned, every call we run should be a tribute to the family members we lost.

[Brian Dunlap Forum Member Find all posts View Profile Close Brian Dunlap]

SCOOBY14B,

You are not alone Brother, Since 09-11 I find my-self watching some of the televised specials on the FDNY and hey...I'll admit it I shed tears and my throat closes up. ~ Although I personally don't know any FDNY Firefighters I still feel like I lost 343 members of my family. ~ I'm alot closer to NY City than you are and on the day of the attacks I wanted nothing more than to run up there and start digging and by the time I started out I herd news reports to have Volunteers stay out of the attacl zone until called for so I remained ever vigil through out the first week waiting for the call. ~ I find my-self going to sleep at night and sometimes wondering What if ? What if I lost someone from my company ? How would I feel. ~ We are a small town Volunteer Company but we're busy and we do catch "work" often through out the year and before 9-11 I always fiqured I'd return to the station but since that horrific day I wonder....And I'm more careful now than I ever was. ~ What I have a hard time swallowing is the famlies the 343 FDNY Members left behind....Some had young Children and Some with expecting wives that will give birth and that child will never know their father. I'm still broken up over that and I don't think I'll get over it....So with that said No my friend you are not alone. ~

Thanks to all who read this for letting me get this off my chest and SCOBBY14B hang in there as I said you are not alone by any means

[LT1/101 Forum Member Find all posts View Profile Close LT1/101]

Scooby
No you are not the only one. I watch the shows, and read things about the brothers lost, I read about their lives and families- and it kills me. And everytime I cry. But I feel I need to watch/listen/read about them, I think (in my warped little mind) that some how it honors them. Because like you I did not know them personally. Althought I wish I had. But I think it effects all fireman, no matter where we are. It should hurt us- we are a brotherhood- who lost 343 men. We will never forget that, and it will be a long time before we move forward from this. If at all.

FDNY we will never forget 9-11