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  • #31
    Here's one.

    About 10 years ago at my former dept.

    We had a scanner in the kitchen that scanned all the PD channels. Once in a great while we'd get a jump on a wreck or car fire in our district by overhearing the cops call one in to their dispatch, but for the most part it was just background noise.

    One evening, we hear a cop get dispatched to a "public assist" at (whatever the address was). The captain immediately looked up and said "Hey, that's my house!" and got on the phone to call his wife to find out what was going on. He got a busy signal.

    Well, we turn the volume up and start listening. About a minute later, the cop on the call comes back telling the dispatcher that his in-car computer is down and he needs the details on the call over the radio. The dispatcher tells him that "the complaintaint is handcuffed to her bed and needs an officer to unlock her." The cop "ten-four's" laughing.

    With a really incredulous look, and decidedly not laughing, the captain says "Let's go."

    We got to his house at about the time the cop was leaving. The cop had no idea that the naked woman he'd just unlocked from her bed was a fireman's wife, and when he saw us pull up, he said "Hey, I didn't call for you guys." The cap brushed past him and into the house as we explained to the cop who the woman was.

    The cop then filled the rest of us in. Apparently, the captains's old lady had been drinking in a bar, picked up some guy, and taken him home and had a little sex play that involved her being handcuffed to the bed. Well, Mr. Handcuffs from the bar apparently decided to just leave her handcuffed and help himself to some of the riches from the house before leaving.

    She was able to pull the headboard loose enough to get ahold of the phone next to the bed and could only think to dial 911 and ask for someone with handcuff keys to come to the house.

    Well, the the captain had a little talk with the old lady and the cop stayed around just in case he tried to kill her. He didn't, but they did get divorced soon after. Needless to say, it was a pretty quiet ride back to the station!

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