Leader

Collapse

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Stressed Out Paramedic

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Stressed Out Paramedic

    Im work for a Fire/EMS department and over a year ago I encountered a call that has stressed me out extremely. Due to how I've reacted to this is making me question if Im suitable to work in the EMS field. I want to say that I love being a firefighter/paramedic but I believe that due to the way Im "wired" it makes it difficult for me. This is why i'm seeking this Forum. Im hoping to get some clarity and advice on what Im going through in hopes to come to some sort of conclusion. I hope you can look at this with a open mind and help me in anyway you can
    Heres my story: Aprox a year ago my crew and I responded to a call that turned out to be a Cardiac Arrest. We got the patient in the back of the ambulance and started our interventions. Initally on scene the patient was in PEA. My crew and I started CPR and all the ACLS interventions that go along with it. Eventually I ended up doing Chest Compressions on the patient and this is where all my stress begins. While I was doing Chest Compressions I had this thought in my head that I wanted to Crack or Break the patients Ribs( it was one or the other) and then after I had that thought I actually pushed harder on the patients chest. Shortly after I pushed harder I felt an extreme feeling of guilt due to the fact that I thought I might of intentionally tried to hurt the patient. I know I had that thought of cracking/breaking ribs But I honestly couldn't conclude why and what my intentions were.I asked my self, " Was I just pushing harder on the patients chest and continuing CPR?" or "was I pushing harder in response to those thoughts and actually trying to crack/break the patients ribs and trying to hurt the patient?" To be honest I know i was frustrated on the call but I really had no reason to hurt the patient. I really to this day cant conclude what my intentions were. So, let me continue with the story. We left the scene and transported the Patient to the ER. I ended up driving... At some point during the Call the patient became Asystolic and then at some point after we gave the patient to the hospital they ceased resuscitation measures and the patient died.
    So with all that said. I feel basically like a criminal. I feel like I could of caused the patient to Die. I feel like if I actually intentionally tried to hurt the patient that possibly while I was pushing harder I could of caused the patient to become Asystolic or I could of caused some trauma to the patient and my that my actions were what caused the patient to die. So here I am a year later still feeling guilty over this and actually feeling like a criminal and the stress just never goes away.
    Im sure reading this you guys are going to think im crazy but Im just trying to find out the right thing to do. I don't know where else to go. I feel like such a horrible person. I just want to live a normal life again and enjoy my job but I cant get past this! What should I do?
    Any help would be great!
    Thanks!!!l
    Lodius

  • #2
    if ya aint crackin ribs, ya aint doin it right. or so i was told.

    Comment


    • #3
      Sounds like an isolated thing... and that there might be other things weighing on your mind.

      I would find a trusted friend or professional and hash it out.
      I am now a past chief and the views, opinions, and comments are mine and mine alone. I do not speak for any department or in any official capacity. Although, they would be smart to listen to me.

      "The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list."

      "When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water."

      Comment


      • #4
        They were in cardiac arrest when you got there. You cracking a rib or two is not gonna make you kill them the fact of the matter is you are gonna crack ribs. I've been on many codes were ribs were broken some lived, and some didn't. You have to distance yourself and just remember they were in trouble before you got there, during your time with them, and after they were handed off to the hospital as long as you know you did everything you can that's all that matter.

        Comment


        • #5
          the thought of hurting a patient > the thought of losing a patient by not doing enough
          ‎"I was always taught..." Four words impacting fire service education in the most negative of ways. -Bill Carey

          Comment


          • #6
            last time I checked you were supposed to be pushing hard enough to break em.

            I'd rather see another medic doing good compressions than the half *** crap most of them do... using one hand.. pushin about an inch down.

            I think if you get to that point where you're doing compressions like that.. shoot another message up on here... otherwise go and break some more ribs.

            Comment


            • #7
              Sorry, not buying this post.
              No way this guy is a paramedic.
              Put on ignore list.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by flipper123 View Post
                Sorry, not buying this post.
                No way this guy is a paramedic.
                Put on ignore list.
                I was kinda thinking the same thing

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by flipper123 View Post
                  Sorry, not buying this post.
                  No way this guy is a paramedic.
                  Put on ignore list.
                  In what ways do you not think Im a paramedic. DO you think i would just write all this for nothing?

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Thanks for all the advice so far guys. I appreciate it. Sometimes its nice to speak to others instead of trying to figure it out all on your own.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      How long have you been a medic?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Lodius,

                        If you are who you say you are, you would know that doing CPR on someone will most likely crack or break ribs. Sometimes a crack or crunch you hear or feel could be calcium breaking off the cartilage too.

                        What would be the most harmful to life? If a person is in cardiac arrest, that would be the most harmful, not a few cracked ribs. Like what was said before, you didn't cause the problem, you did everything you could within your power, and you did no further harm.

                        I would find your supervisor and ask to get some assistance with an EAP (Employee Assistance Program) that usually is free to you.
                        Jason Knecht
                        Firefighter/EMT
                        Township Fire Dept., Inc.
                        Eau Claire, WI

                        IACOJ - Director of Cheese and Whine
                        http://www.cheddarvision.tv/
                        EAT CHEESE OR DIE!!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Yes, quit you weirdo.
                          RK
                          cell #901-494-9437

                          Management is making sure things are done right. Leadership is doing the right thing. The fire service needs alot more leaders and a lot less managers.

                          "Everyone goes home" is the mantra for the pussification of the modern, American fire service.


                          Comments made are my own. They do not represent the official position or opinion of the Fire Department or the City for which I am employed. In fact, they are normally exactly the opposite.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by lalodius View Post
                            Im work for a Fire/EMS department and over a year ago I encountered a call that has stressed me out extremely.


                            Heres my story: Aprox a year ago my crew and I responded to a call that turned out to be a Cardiac Arrest. We got the patient in the back of the ambulance and started our interventions. Initally on scene the patient was in PEA. My crew and I started CPR and all the ACLS interventions that go along with it.

                            Eventually I ended up doing Chest Compressions on the patient and this is where all my stress begins.

                            While I was doing Chest Compressions I had this thought in my head that I wanted to Crack or Break the patients Ribs( it was one or the other) and then after I had that thought I actually pushed harder on the patients chest.

                            Shortly after I pushed harder I felt an extreme feeling of guilt due to the fact that I thought I might of intentionally tried to hurt the patient. I know I had that thought of cracking/breaking ribs But I honestly couldn't conclude why and what my intentions were.I asked my self, " Was I just pushing harder on the patients chest and continuing CPR?" or "was I pushing harder in response to those thoughts and actually trying to crack/break the patients ribs and trying to hurt the patient?" To be honest I know i was frustrated on the call but I really had no reason to hurt the patient. I really to this day cant conclude what my intentions were.
                            I'm confused...

                            This happened a year ago? You mention this twice.

                            IS this the only time in one year that you had to do CPR or chest compressions?

                            None of us are in your head son, so we cannot tell you how to resolve this. You have to do that yourself, but most likely with some help. Since you were compelled to post your situation here, I'm thinking you may be suffering from PTSD the equivalent of Critical Incident Stress. You're letting this issue get to you way to much and need to let it go. So I urge you to request some help through the Dept.

                            Look... basic facts:

                            You did not cause the issue.

                            You did not make is worse.

                            My opinion doesn't mean squat but I'm thinking you're feeling guilty because you did not save a life. You are associating your actions as failure. The outcome had nothing to do with whether you or I or anyone failed. Most patients in that situation do not survive... you already know that.

                            Get some help Son and let it go, before it makes you old before your time or eats a hole in your gut, much like it is doing right now.

                            PK
                            HAVE PLAN.............WILL TRAVEL

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              I want to start off by saying thank you for all the advice so far!
                              I am who I say I am. Ive been a medic about 6 months but spend most my time on a Engine so I don't see much EMS. I don't get why some of you think Im on here making up a story. Ive got better things to do than that! I can agree that I have let this situation get the best of me. The thing that bothers me the most is the fact that for some reason I felt like I was intentionally trying to crack/break the patients ribs and that just makes me feel bad on a personal level, It makes me feel like I was intentionally trying to hurt that individual and I feel like I should be punished for it. I feel guilty.. Should I? or am I over thinking this? Do you agree? Or am I thinking way to far into this?

                              Comment

                              300x600 Ad Unit (In-View)

                              Collapse

                              Upper 300x250

                              Collapse

                              Taboola

                              Collapse

                              Leader

                              Collapse
                              Working...
                              X