Nonunderstanding Wife

[Kman87]

My wife and I are both in the military and plan on getting out in a couple years when our contracts are up. I told her I have my heart set on becoming a firefighter and she flat out said "No you're not going to do that!" I understand that she's scared of me getting hurt and she had a friend who was a firefighter and got killed, but I still feel like she's being selfish. Should I take my wife's advice or is she being too selfish?

[Dashman]

No offence to you,But I cant belive you would ask a question like that here.
Maybe Dear Abby would be a better bet.

[CaptOldTimer]

My wife and I are both in the military and plan on getting out in a couple years when our contracts are up. I told her I have my heart set on becoming a firefighter and she flat out said "No you're not going to do that!" I understand that she's scared of me getting hurt and she had a friend who was a firefighter and got killed, but I still feel like she's being selfish. Should I take my wife's advice or is she being too selfish?

Yes take her advice

[Kman87]

ok i get the point. i'll take this question somewhere else.

[FFighterRob]

Even the most supportive wife will have times that they wish their husbands had not been firefighters. When you are gone on holidays, birthdays, 120 hour shifts, they miss you. I have heard from my wife more than once, “I never signed up to be a single parent”.

Three summers ago two of the best guys and greatest firefighters in the world died in a structure fire trying to save a couple. That only made things worse, because before she was just missing me and worrying a little, now she worries a lot and misses me more.

If your wife already doesn’t like the idea it isn’t going to get better, only worse. If something happens, you get hurt, the dog runs away, you get a divorce it will all be your fault and because you became a firefighter and didn’t listen to her.

Having military service makes it a lot easier to get hired as a firefighter, so does being a woman. Maybe she should join the fire service first and then see how it really is and you can follow. My department has a lot of husband and wife firefighters, the two paychecks would be nice. You just want to make sure if you do this you always get promoted before her, you don’t want to be outranked at home and at work.

Good Luck, Capt Rob

[Theaxemancometh]

My wife and I are both in the military and plan on getting out in a couple years when our contracts are up. I told her I have my heart set on becoming a firefighter and she flat out said "No you're not going to do that!" I understand that she's scared of me getting hurt and she had a friend who was a firefighter and got killed, but I still feel like she's being selfish. Should I take my wife's advice or is she being too selfish?

I sent you a PM dude!!
"The Axeman"

[Nozzleman25]

My wife loves my schedule, can be a pain at times like mentioned but the fact that every three days her and the kids get a day to themselves and the other two days I am home to be with her and the kids. She just blocks out the potential bad parts of the job and goes on with it.

[CaptBob]

If mama isn't happy nobody's happy. You could do hard time if you don't listen. There is no winning here. Only degrees of losing.

A minister for a large city told the new rookies, "76% of the firefighters on this department have been divorced at least once. If you want to get married find someone you hate and buy them a house."

[BW21]

She doesnt need to worry about you getting hurt on the job..
That won't be the scary part...

The scary part is finding a career job first

[peterbound]

Wait, your coming out of the Military, and /now/ she's worried about you getting hurt on the job?

Seems like you might be a little safer as a FF. Just me.

[Kman87]

Wait, your coming out of the Military, and /now/ she's worried about you getting hurt on the job?

Seems like you might be a little safer as a FF. Just me.

We both have desk jobs in the Air Force.

[Flame Out]

Maybe a new wife is in order.

[sweetpete]

I've been married for 14 years and I love my wife with all my heart. No job is worth an unhappy spouse.

Just my opinion. I'd be a garbage man (not that there's anything wrong with that, just sayin', it's not my cup of tea, but I'd still do it) if it meant keeping my wife happy and less stressed out.

Take care,
Pete

[legos.8ty7]

she's being selfish.

my wife knows and understands what this job means to me. she knows the sacrifices she and i will have to make for it. she knows i will move to wherever i need to get it.

ive always told my wife, i rather you make less money doing something you love than many big bucks doing something you hate.

if you're not happy, then she won't be.

[BoxAlarm187]

she's being selfish.

my wife knows and understands what this job means to me. she knows the sacrifices she and i will have to make for it. she knows i will move to wherever i need to get it.

ive always told my wife, i rather you make less money doing something you love than many big bucks doing something you hate.

if you're not happy, then she won't be.

Man, sounds like you've been eavesdropping on conversations between my wife and I. Couldn't have written that better myself.

To the OP: Who the hell wants to go to a job they hate everyday? What effect is that going to have on the marriage in the long run?

Why doesn't she want you to be a firefighter? Nights away from home? The danger? Something else?

I wouldn't say it if it wasn't true: Still the best damn job on earth.