Memo to all workers

[mcaldwell]

Dear Employees,

It has been brought to management’s attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers.
Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated. We do however, realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers. Therefore, a list of “TRY SAYING” new phrases has been provided so that the proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner without risk of offending our more sensitive employees.

TRY SAYING:
Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF:
And when the f*$# do you expect me to do this?

TRY SAYING:
I’m certain that isn’t feasible.
INSTEAD OF:
No f*$#ing way.

TRY SAYING:
Really?
INSTEAD OF:
You’ve got to be sh!##ing me!

TRY SAYING:
Perhaps you should check with…
INSTEAD OF:
Tell someone who gives a sh!#.

TRY SAYING:
I’m not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF:
This sh!# won’t work.

TRY SAYING:
He’s not familiar with the issue.
INSTEAD OF:
He’s got his head up his ass.

TRY SAYING:
So you weren’t happy with it.
INSTEAD OF:
Kiss my ass.
TRY SAYING:
I’m a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF:
F*$# it I’m on salary.

TRY SAYING:
You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF:
Who died and made you boss?

TRY SAYING:
I see.
INSTEAD OF:
Blow me.

TRY SAYING:
He’s somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF:
He’s a prick.

TRY SAYING:
She’s an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF:
She’s a ball-busting bitch.

TRY SAYING:
I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF:
You don’t know what the f*$# you’re doing.

Thank you
Human Resources:D

[RspctFrmCalgary]

Too f'n funny!!!

ummmm I mean, that's rather amusing

:D :D :D

[FireSarge]

way f@#$*n cool



wait no awesome

or was it something else oh well they can blow me:p